Tag: beaste

The $aints come Marching

“The Jake Paul of the VFL” is taking his third stab at owner this season after two seasons that you could say were….disappointing at the least. Luckyy started things off with tabbing runningback Del as his GM. Rumors that Del thought he got blacklisted if he turned down a GM spot and didn’t know that some of the Saints players were bugged are not a great way to start things off.

I’ll be honest here. I am not sure what the lines are overall, but assuming line one is Luckyy, Del, and r3dhour. This line has some chemistry from last season with the Chiefs when Mr. Paul and R3d played together. Good news, reports today stated Luckyy can make his fgs now. Bad news, you still gotta get in fg range. Del is a good runningback and an awful defensive line user. *Sidenote: I only say this because he stopped every run play I called for negative yardage last season so screw that guy.” With good defensive users and a great defensive roster, this line should cause some problems… for absolutely NOBODY.

Line 2 is headed by Ponchy, the only max bid to actually PAY a team to let him play for them. Pairing him with Outaker at WR/DL and Brisket at RB/DB is a good pairing. However we all know Ponchy HATES his users so Luckyy could have drafted literal potatoes here and there would be no difference offensively. Outaker is an amazing DL user, but how will not being able to peek into the opposing teams locker rooms affect his skill? it is yet to be known. Brisket is one of my favorite WRs in the league, I have a slight mancrush on his especially after he put me on his broad muscular back last season and whisked me away during those lonely starry nights. God the things I would… whops getting carried away those thoughts are for my *secret* site.

make sure to subscribe for the FULL details, only $8.99 a month

Frankly, I don’t think its fair that we are letting Beaste play for two teams this season. It’s wrong and a travesty. Wait, what the fuck is a mocarbone? I have on good authority that it is Beaste. Have they ever been in a party together? Didn’t think so. MocarBeaste should have a good statiscial season with self proclaimed MVP Kwam3 and Jacc on his line. These boys are all business and have a winning pedigree that should help carry this squad to new heights.

I truly don’t know if its Mo, Beaste, or some to be named third person playing on this account

I see this team winning 8 games this season, sneaking into the playoffs and going full on Bountygate and paying other teams to lose en route to a superbowl appearance.

The Washington Redskins,Football Team, Commanders are the greatest, and they are telling everyone.

If you’ve been in the league for more than thirty seconds, I am sure you have heard all about how great the Washington Commanders team is. Whether its THREE THOUSAND TIME SUPERBOWL CHAMP Beaste owning the team, or REGULAR SEASON GOAT Champ as the max bid QB, there certainly is a lot of reason for optimism.

Have to start off things here with Beaste and his line. I caught up with Beaste after his prolonged vacation for a rather awkward interview. “I’m back from my BULLSHIT suspension and im gonna fu….” I noticed him look over his shoulder and see the league staff with their ban hammer at the ready and he got oddly quiet. Paired with his brother, who doesn’t speak for himself becuase Beaste does that for him, and Clutchking this line is going to be very formidable. My prediction, this line goes 5-0 until Beaste ends up taking another early vacation, then 0-7 to finish things out.

Beaste spent his offseason time looking menacingly off in the distance

Line two is an old retread in the League, Champ, Farah, and Klay. This line has often produced great regular seasons, and not so great playoff runs. Champ is a regular MVP candidate every season. I attempted to reach Farah for comment, however he was far to busy gagging on the WFT roster to get any kind of intelligent response out. I predict this line has at least two season award winners at the end of the year and somehow ends up with negative playoff wins. While leaving the locker room I swear I heard someone moaning “Apke!….Ya Forest you can have my box of chocolates!” Disturbing.

Yes, I would advise running to if I saw Farah coming into the building

Line 3 is an interesting one. League legend KoolAidz is back on this madden for a whopping THREE whole days. Man is a super intelligent QB, great decision maker. So much so, that he bought a damn Xbox one S instead of a Series S. I understand KoolWhip, life is hard. However he did correct this on draft day, I’m not bitter or anything not like my team was gonna draft him if he had the right console. (Fuck You) Paired with a human highlight reel in ungluedTiger should make for one hell of a squad. Although i am extremely concerned with the type of activites Mr. Tiger gets up to with a name like that, worst case is he fits right in. This line 100% is carrying this team to the promised land after everyone else falls apart after Beastes inevitable ban.

Qb and Rb showing so much love